My cycle is playing with me

My temp is still way up. I am now 14dpo. My normal luteal phase length is 10-12 days, though last cycle was 13. I had a negative test at 12dpo, and at that point pretty much decided there is no way I am pregnant. My cervix was partially open that day, too, which happens a day or two before my period arrives. However, it went back to being firm and closed yesterday, which is very confusing. I've been having cramps since 12dpo that feel like my period is starting. It concerns me a little bit because the constant cramping was one of my endometriosis symptoms. I'm getting paranoid that the endo is coming back already, but it shouldn't be. Not this quickly. I really don't want to have another surgery any time soon.

So now I'm sitting here playing the maybe game with myself, which is so ridiculous. I can't be pregnant. I just can't be. There are too many signs saying that my period is coming. But the fact that it's a day late and my temperatures are so high (98.7 this morning and 99.1 last night before bed!) makes me wonder.

And then part of me kind of hopes I'm not because I'll feel like a slimeball. We got some yummy drinks to try on Friday night and I had a few too many (oops...yummy shots are a bad idea). My temp on Saturday was 99.0, but I credit that to the alcohol (again, oops) and discarded it.

Sigh. I should just take my last test and get it over with. But I kind of like this hope I have going on, and odds are that will end as soon as I pee on that last test...ugh.