Sooooo moody

I was the ideal pregnant person the first time. I was happy all the time, I was rarely sick, my moods were kept pretty well in check (I was more weepy, but that was over TV shows, songs, etc rather than some random thing my husband said). This time, I yell at the dog, I yell at the husband, I yell at the kid. I throw things (not at anybody, just to make a nice loud sound and get some "anger" out), I cry for no reason. I start off my day perfectly happy and then turn into some angry person that I don't even recognize. It's kind of awful!

I am really hoping this is all some nasty side-effect of the first trimester and that it will be leaving me soon. I will be 14-weeks tomorrow (a full week into the 2nd trimester--yeah!) and I seem to be feeling better. As long as I take my Unisom the night before, the nausea really isn't bad anymore (I've tried not taking it twice...both times I spent the next day vomitting. Don't think I'm ready to give it up yet!). The fatigue is so-so. It's not AS bad, but I'm still a much happier person if I get my 2-hour nap.

I know this will be worth it. I'm feeling baby every-other-day or so, and that's been a lot of fun. I was much further along before I felt Ian, so it's been an unexpected (but happy!) surprise. I'm really looking forward to the daily movements and feeling it on the outside. I can't wait for Hazen and Ian to be able to share in this, especially since I'll be nearly 20 weeks before we hear the heartbeat again. And I am really looking forward to the honeymoon stage of pregnancy. I'm excited to feel good, have some energy back, and start growing my obvious belly. :)

12 weeks, 4 days

Things are going well. Had my 12 week appointment last week (was 11 + 5), and the heartbeat was so loud and clear, I couldn't believe it. I remember Ian's heartbeat being muted and hard to pick out (plus it was hard to find), but this time she found it within seconds and it was so easy to hear. We didn't get to listen long--baby didn't like the doppler and was bumping into it and moving away, and that was making me laugh. So we got maybe 5 seconds of listen time between the baby and me being incooperative. It was beating at about 160bpm, compared to 140 at 6 weeks, 5 days.

I'm starting to feel better. Still exhausted by the end of the day, but the nausea is slowing down. Haven't thrown up in about a week, knock on wood (though it has been replaced by a very irritating headache)!

The belly is starting to pooch. I'm pretty regularly in maternity wear these days, particularly the pants. It's hard to find pants that I like, that are in my size, and that don't cost a fortune. I refuse to spend a ton of money on maternity clothes, especially since I'm saving for my cloth diaper stash. Ross has been okay, but I've only found one pair of pants there. They should get me through the second trimester (which starts Friday!!!!), but I really don't think they'll be much help once the third hits. I also got three shirts that are cute, but I think they'll also be more for the second and useless to me in the last couple of months.

I am in such disbelief that I got my sticky baby already. I mean, 26 months isn't "already" by any means, but that the first positive tests I had actually resulted in a healthy baby (jumping ahead by 6 months, I know, but at this point it really looks like I'll be bringing home a squishy newborn in March!!). Based on our first experience, I expected a miscarriage. I don't know why, I just thought that I would get pregnant, miscarry, and then a few months later get pregnant with our keeper. It's twisted and stupid, I know, but it was my expectation. And then with the spotting and all...I just really thought it was over before we really got started.

And now, for some cheerful news--I felt the baby this morning! I've been really trying and focusing on it for the last week or so, and today the beanie obliged. I can't describe it, only a mommy who has been through the early movements can understand it, but it was unmistakably baby. I can't wait until I can feel it all regularly and have a little foot or bottom sticking out of my belly in weird angles...I LOVE the huge pregnant stage and I am looking so forward to it. I'm looking forward to it ALL. :)